A Day In My Life

wow its been a really long time.
alot has happened.

over the past couple of years i've never blamed God or got mad at him when things went bad or wrong...so why does it seem like he keeps punishing me?

its almost like it's not fair, which i know life isn't fair.

its like i can't be happy or i never am and i've taught myself to put on a fake smile and i've gotten really really good at fooling everyone around me.

i hate it when people back-stab you..isn't that just annoying-i mean common really?

i'm not the one to be fored to do something i don't, but i hate it when (you know it's wrong and you can't help it) but you try to please the world...or make them happy,
ok you know me better than that, its not illegal or would get me into trouble just little minor things that you don't have to do.

ok enough babling heres the real scoop...
ever want to just cry?
ever want to just sit down and cry but you feel dumb?
ever just have those days that a rain clowd is over your head?
ever have have it when the ONLY person you want to talk or cry to doesn't ask?
I DO!
and it seems like my only therapy is my horses but
they are know where near me so thats no help at all!!

oh and whats really really annoying is when people think they are hlping but really they are not and they are just being annoying by telling you things or whatever but you know yourself good enough to know what helps you and calms you?

looooonnnnngggg dayyy as you can see. sorry its all run together..i'll sort things out on here later!

-Jenn Marie